Word of the Month

This definition is in accordance with Cassipedia......

Thinger
Part of Speech: noun mostly

Pronounciation: [thing-er]

Definition: An object that replaces many an object. It can mean a variety of things.

Usage: "Look, that belt thinger has come off" "My thinger is in the back of my computer" "Whats his profile thinger"

There is the word of the month, please proceed with caution.

Marco..........Polo!

teehee

So I ventured out to Calgary saturday to tart it up with Jen and I had lined up two dates for sunday.

Saturday we go shopping and we come back to Jens and we are like......hmmmm do we wanna go out still.......hmmm sitting on the couch chatting and drinking and watching movies sounds good.

But in the end, we got all dressed up, we boarded the train, we walked, we drank, we ate and we had a really great time. No men. Lots of people which surprised us both.

Two Caramel Kiss Martinis and a plate of Sweet Potatoe Fries later.....we are back on the train, giggly and tipsy.....awesome.

We do some more hanging out at Jens I did some online chatting with one of my dates for the following day, and a couple of others, and Jens guy wasn't there....sorry Jenn. :(

We go to bed.

Now Sunday.......I have two dates lined up....

Bachelor #1 - I met him on POF, very litle in his profile, but cute nonetheless. When we would chat on MSN he would all of a sudden go offline, and he would say his computer crashed....I brought this up to Jen and shes like....hmmm I think he might be married. Days and days go by without contact, I left him an email as to where I would be and ....still didnt hear from him. Got a little suspicious and not to confident that he would show.

Bachelor #2 - I met this one on Lavalife. Very cute. Hes a Vice Principal and a teacher. Really sweet, a real genuine nice guy, but he wasn't emailing much so I was gonna see how the date went and then maybe write him off. We had done some texting and msn'ing and I could tell he was great....but still being cautious.

Sunday morning, after much teeheeing and getting ready, we decide to go to tims where I am supposed to meet B#1. Still not confident, I am very lucky to have a great friend like Jen :D . Go to start the van, and I can't steer it, no power steering....put it in reverse, try to move it, put it in drive try to move it....nothing. I pop the hood and pretend I know what I am doing and notice that some sort belt thinger had come loose. So I think....well this is great :D ahahahahah.....

We decide to go and eat, then I will phone the tow truck and get it towed to local place to get fixed. I thought I better text B#2 as I was supposed to meet him for lunch. Once I texted him he was very sweet and offered to come to my rescue and see if he could fix it. Bonus points for him. :D So our date started at 11:30 with him coming to Jen's condo, and tinkering under my hood (literally). The waiting for him to come was the hard part as I was getting more nervous by the minute. But I looked out the window and I saw him.......he rang the buzzer.......I am about the throw up at this time

We met, he is nice and good looking and mmmm all sorts of yummy. We talk and talk and he tinkers and then we wait for the tow truck as in the end he couldn't fix it, and he really wanted to be the hero and fix it. He drives me over to fix it place and I book it in.

Then I call the ex....... which is always fun....he was his typical asshatty self and demanded that I come back that night, its not his problem. Wow hes a grown up.

So B#2 offered to drive me home. We had lunch, which was now like 3 in the afternoon, and then he drove me two hours home.

So to make a long story short, He has made me floopy once again :D

teehee

i quit

Ok so I have come to some conclusions about online dating.

I am very bitter and can not seem to handle rejection well, I mean really who does...right.

Men, no scratch that, Boys......seem to think with their penis and seem to be interested in whats south......fyi! I have a brain.

I have become very paranoid that these men are deviants and I will end up on the evening news.

I think I need to step away from the online dating and just let whats supposed to happen ....happen... whatever that is.

:D

ahhh kids :D

So My 7 almost 8 year old daughter has this thing about her and it reminds me of me. With 4 kids in the house it tends to get ....well....a little chaotic. Someone is crying, someone is yelling at someone else, chaos.

Hope, my spunky daughter, usually turns to me and says with a smile....

"It's going to be a GREAT day, right mommy" hahaha...and then i say "YES...its going to be a great day."

So...when you find yourself not so happy....think inside....that 'it's going to be a great day!"

:D

hm.

So Online Dating Sucks...and it Sucks ASS!

It is just not fun anymore. I get a couple of pings, messages etc. and I get a boost and feel good about myself. Then, on the other hand, there are the jerks who (a) want cyber sex (b) don't message back or (c) say they will then never do. So the boost you had .......deflates and you become this angry, bitter, bitchy person who wants to go and punch something, kick something or shoot teeny tiny paintballs at to release the feelings of inadequacy.

So I think I may give up. I may remove myself and just be happy with me, who at the moment, is bitter and angry :D

-sigh-

why

So I went to work...after getting a million kids ready for school. I come home and I am alone eating my spaghetti, when I get pinged by my MIL (mother in law).

She says she has bad news, Grandpa just died. I was shocked. It isn't really shocking considering he had an aneurism and we knew it was coming, just didnt think it was going to be today.

We were fairly close, he would always stop by the house and visit the kids, he was Gramps.

So sitting here stunned, thinking why....why do people have to die....

and....I feel bad because I was there where he was living and I didnt say hello. Since the seperation and divorce I didnt think he liked me too much....but I didnt say hello. Dam....

Why.

I Was Blocked! Wicked!

Alright, so yesterday and pretty much the last week, I have been very blah...and meh. (*Just an aside, I never knew what 'meh' meant, I do now....:D)

This whole online dating thing, well I don't have trouble getting hits, but the trouble lies in me. I like people, I like attention, and I like well....SEX. I am a thinker, I think with my heart and not my head, and it winds me up falling head over heals and heart broken. So.....once again I am online and I am 'fishin'. I happen upon an attractive guy, doesn't seem to to bad, mentions some sort of crap about censoring out children from these websites as its dangerous......yadda yadda yadda...

So I send him a message, and I say.....(keep in mind this is from memory as I deleted all the messages)

Me: Hi....happened upon your profile, thought I would say Hello. I agree with you about the children. Lets chat sometime. C.

He messages me back the next day and says....

Him: I had some neices and nephews and I took them off. Sure.....Y

So then I was like Sure? ....and what the f..k does the Y stand for....

I had several suggestions from Jenn...teehee...Yoda was my favorite :D

So I message back and say..

Me: Well message me. And btw what does the 'y' stand for....

Him: What does the 'c' stand for....

Me: I asked you first.....My name is Cassie. I showed you mine now you show me yours...

Him: Yvan.....what else you gonna show?

Me: Yvan....working on figuring it out. I can show you my.....sparlking personality....my brain.....tsk tsk I am not that kind of girl. (shut up...)

So then it went on for a couple of more messages about me wanting love and dating and dinner at least and he wanting lap dancing. So in the end.....after I say no.....

Him: Why don't you go and spend time with your four kids.

Me: I said they are all in bed and its mommy time...

Now keep in mind....I had had some Big Girl Lemonade (citrus vodka and lemonade, yummmy) and I am bitter, and lets face it, bitchy...so I thought NO I am not letting this asshole get away with being a jerk....so I say

Me: You know its guys like you that give online dating a bad name. Just because a girl shows interest doesnt mean they want to tear their panties off.

to which he replys....

Him: well to begin w/...don't kid yourself...you''re not even my type...sometimes we say things to get rid of you'se cows....4 kids..think I'm interested?? **** no!!!

love the you'se cows (HAHA) and before I could respond and say he was an asshole and no wonder he was single he blocked me :D

Swwwweeeeeeeeeeet!

love the online dating :D so I have taken some advice that someone I have never met but it is quite knowledgeable said and I will quote them now....

I will stop 'arse-fuckin' on these online dating sites and go to a hotel bar with my good friend Jenn and find me a nice man :D

Update

Ok Soooooo my crazy apparently has not scared Mr. Phone Sex away......

He told me I think too much (this is true) and to Relax....( which is also a good idea)

I am hoping that he is interested in me and not just a piece....I guess time will tell...:D

At any rate, thinking of dropping the whole online dating thing. I can appreciate how it works for some and they meet their true love soul mate but ....not having much luck.

my crazy

So I am a girl. Sometimes girls get hormonal.....people usually call it PMS. When I get hormonal I sometimes feel insecure and sorry for myself, especially now, when I am trying to find someone to spend time with. Its hard when I get these feelings of inadequacy and s

I am chatting with this guy and I unload my 'crazy' on him. I do believe I have scared him away, possibly because of what I said.

I hope not, I hope my 'crazy' hasn't scared him away. Oh well, I can't apologize. We all have a touch of crazy. right?

empty nest.......already?

So it is that time of year again.....back to school. My oldest daughter went into grade 4, doesn't like school much, second one down went into grade 2, so far so good. My son starts kindergarten and he goes twice sometimes three times a week all day like his sisters. I have mixed feelings about this. I am happy for him because he is very bright and could use some structure and interaction with his peers but also, sad because hes my little boy and he is out there away from me. And now, my little baby girl, who will be three in a couple of weeks, may be going to preschool everyday. -heaves a BIIIIIG sigh-

Don't get me wrong, I will enjoy the free time but ....still...Soon they will be old and starting their own lives....dramatic hmmm yes :D

I solemnly swear......

Ok so I have established that I may have an addiction....

to

SEX!

I seem to want to have sex, and usually do, on the first date and then the boys don't talk to me. I think I may be giving it up too quickly......hmmm ok.

So I solemnly swear, that I, Cassie Williams, will not have sex, until I am in some sort of relationship. Relationship meaning more than one date :S .

You are all my witnesses.

human nature....pffft!

I think human nature can kiss my ass......

We want the 'things' we can't have and the 'things' we don't want...end up finding us.

Its not fair....

Ok so I hearted this guy and he up and went and got himself a girlfriend, passing me by. meh whatever. I move on and try to pick up the shattered pieces of my life and find a very nice, cute, normal (very important) man, who yeah, isn't in a relationship place right now.

FUUUUUUCK!

thank you for listening..

:D

Word of the Day

The definition according to Cassipedia...

floopy
Part of speech: adjective

Pronounciation: [floo-py]

Definition: The butterfly feeling in the stomach when someone of the opposite sex texts, phones, emails, talks to, looks at, touches or any of the above in any order.

Usuage: "O my god it's ____ calling me. He makes me all floopy!"...."I wish he didn't make me feel floopy".

So there you have it. The Word of the day is Floopy. Please use this word at least once in your lifetime.

I heart my job.

So I live in a small town. I live in one of the small towns that makes up the Crowsnest Pass. It is so small there is not even a regular grocery store here but there are two bars and a post office haha go figure.

I work in the other small town down the highway. I work in a store called the Bargain Shop. It is a cross between Zellers and Walmart and Kmart. We sell almost everything except for perishable food.

I work part part part time. I mean its like maybe 8 hours a week and it isn't alot but it gets me out of the house and with the grown ups. The reason I love it ...its not because of the high wage as thats a laugh, its not because of the things I actually do, stocking shelves is not very challenging. Its because of the people I encounter on a regular basis.

Because its a small town you get to know the people that frequent the Bargain Shop. I especially like the 'nice' elderly people and even the old crotchety ones. They just make it all worthwhile. I even got tipped for my trouble.

I heart my job.

Random Thoughts

I would like to post these random thoughts I have. I would like to call them a little bit of Murphy's Law and a little bit Cassie :D


When I could not find my ring that I bought and loved, I had to buy another one, and then found it the next day.

Why do we, as human beings, always want the things we can't have the most.

Why do I watch Kids TV when I am alone.

Why do the animals on these shows walk and talk but also have pets......it's like Goofy is a dog, he can walk and talk, but Pluto, who is also a dog, can't.

The phone always rings when I am changing a diaper or going to the bathroom.

Ok....a little look inside my scary mind :D

Have a good day

There is always one.

So you know when you go to any sort of anything and there is alot of people there is always one that stands out from the rest. This guy was right beside us and man o man if he didn't have a girlfriend.......;)

Besides his incredible odor or the way he clapped his hands to the music or the ever sexy hat head it was the way he would

Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! to the music.

HOT!

so

Hot!

girlz on the looooose ......again...:D

So here is how my weekend went.....

Friday

Drove all 4 of my lovely children to their nana's house and proceeded to Calgary where we were to go to the Stampede to see two singers, Jully Black and Natasha Bedingfield.

So far so good.....

I get to Jens condo....I sneak into her underground parking so I don't have to worry about the code and then call her, as she suggested I might get lost. She knows me so well.

We get dressed up in our cowboy wear (ok just a cowboy hat) and we board the C-Train to go to the grounds.

We get there, we are starving, something about the smell of deep fried anything to send ones stomach a flutter, so we get our food of choice. Me a really big Corn Dog covered in Mustard (love the penis shaped food teehee;)) and Jen a bison burger and we both got a lemondade. Delicious!

We wandered, we watched sound checks, we wandered somemore. Watched Jully Black and Natasha Bedingfield, both shows were awesome. The ONLY bad things were the rowdy teenagers, the people that would cut throught he crowd always at Jen and the pot....gotta love outdoor concerts :D

We all had the munchies (wonder why) so we got some mini donuts....also delicious. We were tired, as it was past our bedtime(11 p.m.), so we decide to go back to the condo via Ctrain. But Jen and all her brilliance thought if we go the opposite direction we would avoid the crowds and she was right. Except for the possible vomiting girl a few seats back all was good there ....:S

We chatted for a bit and then went to sleep.

Saturday

Slept in until 10 ish ( the couch was awesome )....woke up a with pot hangover not good....browsed the computer and had a shower. Decided to go to the mall for some shopping :D and we were starving....I had my usual of chinese food which was good and I needed a coffee fix, went to the closing Starbucks and got my coffee for free....LOVE that!

Bought a few things one was a red purse and some shirts, Jen bought a dress, all in all a success. Went to walmart got a few more things, went to subway got our dinner.

We thought a nap would be a good idea if we were to go out later so we did that and then got ready to go to the local pub. We stayed for an hour wow we are animals :D. We had some pub food, which was really to much food, and a beverage and then made our way back to Jens.

Luckily, Jen has two laptops so we both sat on the couch and we browsed the online dating sites. We both got a few messages and a few requests for instant messaging and I received this one from a 28 year old in Ontario. He was cute and beefy, mmmmm so I thought this could be fun. I start chatting and within two lines of our conversation it takes a turn down the 'sex talk' road. So for assistance, I turn to my wing woman Jen for some help ;)

We were totally messing with this guy and we were laughing so hard that our stomachs hurt and we were crying....it was awesome.

This guy was determined to have cyber sex and was going to satisfy himself whether I was participating or not hahaha. Little did I know I had not blocked these types of conversations so I quickly did that, but it was funny while it lasted :D

Went to bed after all that as it was 3 in the morning.

Sunday

Woke up waaaaaay to early, felt tired and dragged out.....went for breakfast. Then I drove home from there...

All in all it was a fabulous weekend with a great friend. Thanks Jen and thanks for your couch ;)

stupid boys

Ok I officially give up....

I don't understand them....they are complex and confusing.

They don't communicate, they don't express themselves.

I think I will become a lesbian, at least I know my people.

stupid boys

little black dress

She sees him out of the corner of her eye, she can't help but notice him, tall, handsome, elegant. She is only half listening to the conversation with the other ladies about throw pillows and cotton sheets. She turns and catches his attention.

She excuses herself and makes her way out of the party towards the powder room. She closes the door behind her and takes a look in the mirror. She is flushed and nervous.

She hears a light tap on the door.

He enters and they don't speak. His hands cup her face and draws his lips to hers. The kissing is slow at first and then becomes more urgent. He turns her so she is leaning agains the counter facing the mirror. He kisses her neck, her shoulder.

His pants fall to the floor with a gentle clink as the belt hits the linoleum. He gently raises her dress to discover that she is not wearing panties. He enters her and she slowly moans. They become one with each other, grabbing, kissing moaning. The 'come' together in the height of ecstacy and totally lose control.

After they finish and catch their breath, she lowers her little black dress and he pulls up his pants. He opens the door and slips out. She waits a few minutes and then makes her way back to the party.

...to be or not to be

Ok, so I find myself at and interesting stage of my life. I am now, 35, I am in between being married and single, I have 4 children, I think I look pretty good, and I seem to be attractive to the opposite sex.

I had two sort of 'relationships' in this past year. One was with an old High School Boyfriend whom I adore (and still do) and one was with a guy that I met off of Facebook whom sold me the stars and gave me the rocks. Hes an ass, and always will be :D

Ok so here is my dilemma, not sure if that is the right word....ok

I believe there are two types of woman.
1. Casual Sex Types
2 Non Casual Sex Types

I am more of a number 2 because I can have sex (pretty ok with that ) but then emotions come into and I start to feel bad about myself, the whole giving the milk away for free, when he didn't buy the cow (expression). As well, I wonder why I can't find a good man and have sex at the same time, I am a catch, I am a good person, I am lovely.

So, now......

I have had a semi casual sexual relationship with BF from High School because he is safe, familiar, I know his history and hes gooooood.

I have been propositioned by someone else now and I am considering it. He is a guy I used to work with, I don't know a whole lot about him, his name, where he lives, he has a cat, but he is leaving at the end of July. This would be a once only kind of thing and I am on the fence.....not to mention I feel a little guilty about BF and I know thats crazy, because its a casual thing.....I am so fuuuuuucked up.

A wise person told me once (ok it was Jenn) that we are not casual sex type girls

easy yes...casual no :D

me thinks i have got it....

Ok so its been quite a while since I last posted...but ya know life gets in the way and takes you down a crazy road. The days meld into each other and before you know weeks have passed.

I digress...

Ok so I too have joined the online dating scene (see what i do for my friends) and I think I have sort of come to some conclusions.

1. I either get men who are like jail bait or ...who are waaaaay to old....the ones who are in the 'range' are either psychotic looking or ....well less than savoury - call me shallow...meh whatever.

2. If they dont have their picture its for a goooood reason.

3. Today I have a married man hitting on me....WTF!

ok...i am not taking it tooo seriously and quite frankly I am using it to stalk the fish that got away......

typical

Ok so here is a typical 'cassie' moment...................

My son, the only boy I have, graduated today. He is 4 and super smart and graduated from preschool to kindergarten. How precious right.....

So I finally have come into the age of digital cameras and have one and I am very excited by this. I see that it is getting low on batteries, so I decide that I better buy some.

I go to my work and I buy some. First of all, I am cheap and I hate to spend money on batteries, but i know if i buy cheap ass ones, I will take one picture and the bloody thing will die on me. So I buy duracell.

I get to the school, I take a picture of my boy the graduate. It starts to flash at me so I am happy because I bought batteries.

I open the back

it takes AAA

I bought AA....

there you have it, and the saga continues :D

Not So Favorite

So with the good comes the bad. So here is my list of Pet Peeves and Things I don't like. I am a very happy, positive, glass is half full kind of gal so I am not sure how long this list will be. So here it goes...

1. Rude people (I mean ignorant, mean rude to your face type rude)
2. Traffic jams on hot days
3. When you cant open something no matter how hard you try (Pickles....jenn , wink wink)
4. When the light switch is set to the on position when its not on.....(AHHHH cant stand that one)
5. Confrontation of any kind ( I avoid it as much as possible)
6. When people don't like me for no good reason(it bothers me and drives me crazy)


I am sure there are more, and when it happens I will say to myself, probably out loud, ah I should have put that on my list.

:D

..just once...

..just once..

...just once I would like to be the 'chasee' not the 'chaser'

....just once I would like to have someones heart ache for ME

...just once I would like to NOT think about him when I go to sleep at night and when i wake up in the morning..

....just once I would like to stop thinking of his touch, his kisses, his want....

...just once I would like him to embrace me and say, "I want you, I need you, I can not go on one more second without you"

...just once I wish it wasn't so complicated...

...just once I want to have sex with no emotion...

...just once I would like to think with my head and not with my heart...

...just once.

silence

So I am sitting here on the computer (gasp, shocking) and its quiet. It is very, very, eerily quiet but not in a bad way. There are no sounds of laughter, no chatter, no fighting, no children. When the situation changed and I found myself with more 'me' time I did not know what to do with myself. Now, I enjoy the silence. I can watch what I want and do what I want for the first time in a long time.

I am awakened in the silence.

"Favorite Things..."

Ok ...so you know that song from the sound of music...Brown paper packages tied up with strings......These are a few of my favorite things..

(and by the way i have that song stuck in my head, if any of you read this and get it stuck in your head i apologize, actually i don't hahahahahahahah enjoy)

so here is my list

1. Anything my children do to make me laugh hard and out loud
2. Hugs and kisses from said children :D
3. My cat Fiona, shes psychotic but she is my best friend
4. Tingly lip gloss
5. Flowers for no reason
6. My old friends who have become new again...love you guys
7. shoes, any color and description...come on i am a girl ;)
8. Doing this ........alot and :D :D too....on the computer
9. Slow soft kisses
10. Shopping
11. anything pink
12. Lets be honest, 'sex' in general...
13. Facebook
14. and now Blogging

I am sure there are more...but for now its a start

My first Blog...

Ok so here I am, I am blogging....wow i am sooooo happy to be here :D

hahaha ok i am dork, ask Jenn she will tell ya. I have alot to say but don't know how to say it, I am a virgin of sorts....

so be gentle

c